Dena Miller’s Blog

God’s peace is with the humble and meek of heart; your peace will be found in much patience.  IF you hear Christ and follow His voice, you will be able to enjoy much peace.

First, watch yourself in all things, in what you do and what you say. Direct your every intention toward pleasing God alone, and desire nothing outside of God. Do not be quick to judge the deeds and words of otheres, and do not entangle yourself in affairs that are not your own. Thus, it will come about that you will be disturbed little and seldom.

Then realize that the lack of conflict is not the presence of peace. Do not think that you have found true peace if you feel no depression, or that all is well because you suffer no opposition. Do not think that all is perfect if everything happens just as you wish. And do not imagine yourself great or consider yourself especially beloved if you are filled with great love and sweetness. For the progress and perfection of a Christian does not consist in a life of ease.

Instead, spiritual growth consists in offering yourself with all your heart to God’s will, not seeking what is yours either in small matters or great ones, either in temporary or eternal things.

In brief, seek to do the will of others rather than your own. Always choose to have less rather than more. Look always for the last place and seek to be beneath all others. Always wish and pray that the will of God be fully carried out in you. Then you will enter into the realm of peace and rest.

and his name is BILLY!!!  I went to pick Terra up from school today and walking along side her is a VERY tall boy….holding her books. He opens the passenger side door and sticks his head and hand in and introduces himself…very politely. He’s just moved here from Virginia and today was his first day of school. Anyhow, after we drove off Terra tells me that he’s her boyfriend. They met in first period and he told her she was cute, then at lunch they sat by each other and “got to know each other”. Anyhow…he came over 30 minutes later, ate dinner with us, and now they’re gone to church together. I’m excited for her and scared at the same time. I remember all too well my first broken heart, and I don’t want my baby to have to experience that. However, I do realize it’s something we’ve all been through. STILL…I’ll have to restrain myself from killing him   Of course Terra’s on that natural high of a new boyfriend and I’m scared to death! He’s 17, and I know she’s almost 16, but she just doesn’t look that mature in so many ways….she’s still SO little! Anyhow…here’s their first pictures together. And NO! they are not laying on the bed together, I told them to sit back so I could get their picture.

A friend of mine, Rebecka, sent me an email this morning that I wanted to share.  Here it is:

In our building, the doors to the outside have handles on the inside.  So if you are walking out of the building you see this nice big handle and you think that you have to pull but you don’t, you have to push.  I’ve seen many people try to pull the door open.  I’ve had stuff on my mind and not thinking, tried to pull the door open and I’ve been in this building for a year.  They need to remove those handles so there’s no confusion. 

 All of the signs in the building have Braille on them.  There is of course a sign for the STAIRS and underneath the wording is stairs in Braille.  I don’t imagine that a blind person would choose to use the stairs if there is an elevator available but let’s say that the blind person is fitness minded and he did decide to take the stairs.  So he goes up and gets to a floor and there is the sign for floor 2 and again, Braille underneath.  Now his day is done and he is taking the stairs down, he gets to the door on the 1^st floor and there is a sign on the door that says “OPEN DOOR SLOWLY” and again, Braille underneath.  Does he know the sign is there?  Probably not, the other signs would have been expected (stairs, floor 2) but not this one.  And why does it say open door slowly?  That would be because the idiot who designed the doors in this building made the staircase door open into a busy hallway.  You would be way less likely to whack someone in the head with the door if the door opened into the staircase.

 Why do they let men design things?

I woke up this morning and thought ” I want my hair different”. SO…I set off for the salon, and by the time I got there I had decided I wasn’t only going to get a cut….but color too and I wanted something colorful and vibrant. SO…this is what that early morning thought has produced!!!!!

It’s obviously been awhile since I wrote last. Looks like I have alot to update. First off…I have a June 18th appointment with an infectious disease doctor about the lung thing…sounds worse than it is. I was supposed to go this past Wednesday to get my GYN results back from the biopsies, and on Tuesday night the nurse called and said that the biopsy results don’t match the pap results, so they are requesting the slide from the pathologist that was used for my pap to compare it with the biopsy results. SO…I’m waiting on them to get back to me on that. I can’t tell you how SICK to death of doctors I am at this point. And how irritating it is that I can’t seem to get a straight answer from any of the doctors I’ve had to deal with. What’s more frustrating is that they don’t seem to know what they’re doing either. It’d be different if it were only one doctor I was dealing with and he kept messing things up, however, it’s been four to five doctors and none of them seem to have a clue what’s going on and I keep getting conflicting information.  AGGRAVATING!

On another note, I flew to TX this past weekend to visit my friend Melissa, and had a GREAT time.  It was a MUCH needed mini-vacation, and it was wonderful to see Mel after all these years. It’s funny how your circumstances change (kids, job, responsibilities), but your friendships seem to stay the same. It was like we took a step back in time and we were teenagers again being goofy. SO MUCH FUN! Here’s some pictures from my trip:

The kids officially start summer in three weeks….of course they are ready for it. A week after they get out of school we’ll be headed to Gulf Shores and I can’t WAIT!  Terra’s really excited about it too…she loves the beach, but then who doesn’t? Terra also has a choir concert that she’s really excited about next Thursday, the 14th.

Well, that’s all I have for now. It’s Mother’s Day weekend and I plan on spending tomorrow with my mom and Sunday we are going to see Nana Pam and Granny & Papa. Won’t be much of a Mother’s Day for me with all the running around we’re doing…but then…I’m used to that

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO ALL THE WONDERFUL MOM’S OUT THERE! ENJOY YOUR DAY…YOU DESERVE IT!!!!!

I have been really surprised the past two weeks at how much support, encouragement, prayer, and love I’ve received from SO many people. I am so very lucky and fortunate to have such wonderful people in my life. I think we all take for granted the many blessings in our lives sometimes. It’s not that we mean to or even realize we are…we’re just so used to our friends, family, and circumstances that it’s normal for us. Luckily things happen sometimes that redirect our focus and make us take a step back and we are aware of the wonderful people in our lives and how fortunate we are. The past two weeks have been a roller coaster for me…literally. I’ve been up, down, negative, positive, depressed, anxious, angry, etc. I’ve thought about everything from dying and the consequences of that for my family to being with Jesus in Heaven and how comforting it would be to see my Grandma, Papa Bear, Uncle Tommy, and Uncle Ricky. I never prayed for anything specific…I always prayed that God’s will be done no matter what it is and He gives me the strength to handle it and the peace to accept it.   I praise and thank God for the negative results.

I also thank God for reminding me that I have an awesome family. My husband has been absolutely incredible the past two weeks. He’s kept my spirits up with his positive attitude, he’s made me laugh so hard I’ve cried with his silly antics and wonderful sense of humor. He’s taken such good care of me and catered to my needs. He’s never left my side, made calls to the doctors and been at every appointment. He’s truly been amazing, and I have a new found admiration for him. He’s really shown his love and support for me, and that means the world to me. 

My mom…there are literally no words I can think of to describe how amazing she is. I tell her the song from Celin Dion is my song to her: “…for all those times you stood by me, for all the truth that you made me see, for all the joy you brought to my life, for all the wrongs that you made right, for every dream you made come true, for all the love I found in you….I’ll be forever thankful. You’re the one who held me up and never let me fall, you’re the one who saw me through through it all.  You were my strength when I was weak, you were my voice when I couldn’t speak, you were my eyes when I couldn’t see…you saw the best there was in me .  Lifted me up when I couldn’t reach, you gave me faith cause you believed.  I’m everything I am because you loved me.  You gave me wings and made me fly, you touched my hand…I could touch the sky, I lost my faith…you gave it back to me, you said no star was out of reach. You stood by me and I stood tall, I had your love I had it all, I’m greatful for each day you gave me.  Maybe I don’t know that much, but I know this much is true I was blessed because I was loved by you.  You were always there for me…the tender wind that carried me. A light in the dark…shining your love into my life.  You’ve been my inspiration…through the lies you were the truth. My world was a better place because of you!” I couldn’t say it better if I tried. All I can say is she is amazing and I lover her more than words can say!

My mother-in-law Pam is like literally like a second mom to me. Pam and my mom are the greatest women I know. I know most people really don’t care for their mother-in-laws , but I couldn’t have designed a better one. She is a great person to go to for spiritual encouragement and prayer. She can have over 100 people praying for you in an hour if needed! She’s got such an awesome group of friends and church family and from the day I met them, they have made me feel like I’ve always been a part of their family. I am so fortunate to have such an awesome mother in law Pam. And I’m even more fortunate to have Misty/Chad and Keren/Jason as my sister/brother n laws…the fact that I absolutely love and enjoy being with them is a bonus.

I want to send a special thank you to my friends who went out of their way for me. Shay…my friend for 25 years - I love you girl…even though you’ve had your own stuff going on you’ve been there for me with your phone calls and emails everyday and it really means alot to me, more than you know.  Rebecka…thank you so much for being there. Melissa…it’s been great being able to talk to you and even though I didn’t make it to TX this weekend…I’ll be there in two weeks and I won’t feel so bad, thank you for your support. Brandie, I know you’ve had me in your prayers daily so thank you so much!

” Faithful friends are beyond price: No amount can balance their worth”  Sirach 6:15

“Friends always show their love. What are brothers for if not to share troubles?” Proverbs 17:17

“A friend is one who strengthens you with prayers, blesses you with love and encourages you with hope.”

We had a really great weekend. Saturday we went to mom’s. She had one of those moon bounce things and she bought all the grandkids baby chicks. I’m still gonna kill her for that because although my brothers 2 chicks have died…ours are alive and kicking. My friend Rebecka is supposed to pick them up in a couple of weeks and take them to her family’s farm in Missouri. That is…IF I can keep them alive that long. Those things are SO nasty…cute…but nasty. We also let the kids bust a pinata and of course the traditional easter egg hunt. We stayed at her house til about 6:30…needless to say we were all exhausted by the time we got home. The kids were so tired they slept untikl 9 on Sunday. We met Nana Pam and them at Mullins Station Baptist Church for service. Afterwards we went to Bubba’s house were the Raines side of our family gathered. I ended up going home around 3:30 because I was feeling horrible, and I still had a headache I’d had since Friday.

I’m so thankful that we had such beautiful weather on Saturday for my mom’s thing, considering it was outdoors. I have the best family in the world all around and I am so very thankful of them all!

Here’s some pictures of this weekend:

I started taking the diet pills my doctor prescribed yesterday and I have to say…THEY WORK!! They made me feel kinda strange, but food tasted horrible.  All I had to eat yesterday was about five bites of a salad, a piece of cheese and a bowl of cereal. I had to MAKE myself eat that because I was feeling queasy. So all that’s good news, however the bad news is that I hardly slept at all last night. I had a very restless night and although I feel awake right now (because I took another pill this morning), I’m hoping I’ll be exhausted by bed time tonight and can get a good nights sleep. I do however; have to stay up at least until the Tigers win their game tonight.

GO TIGERS!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I made it to the doctor this morning. Seems that I pulled a muscle in my lower back. So he prescribed me a pain killer and anti-inflammatory…along with DIET PILLS!!! I have to admit that I’m pretty excited about the pills. I would like to say that I don’t intend to ever excercise again…but I don’t think I’m giving up on it just yet. I looked up the diet pills online and it seems they are only intended for short term use…and get this…in OBESE people.  I didn’t consider myself OBESE…until I got on the scales at the doctors office that is.  I think the scale was WAY off base on my weight…I think they jack the scales 10 pounds higher than you actually are to get people motivated to eat right and excercise. SO…my hopes are that I can lose about 30 or more pounds in the next month with excercising…but mostly with the assistance of the pills.  We’ll see…I’ll keep you posted.

I learned last night that excercise is NOT my friend.  We’re going to Gulf Shores in June and my mom says she doesn’t want to go with a whale….meaning me! My husband has been on an excercise kick for about two months now and doing pretty good on it…SO…yesterday even though I was feeling horrible, I went for a walk/run when I got home from work.  I thought I was going to die when I got back from this. However, the real pain didn’t start until later that night when I was watching Casino with Eddie and Terra. My lower back started hurting something fierce and after sitting in the recliner for two hours watching this movie, when I got up to go to bed I could hardly walk. I think I dislocated my kidney during my walk/run. It took me two solid hours to get to sleep and I woke up moaning every time I tried to switch positions. This morning  I was able to get myself out of bed and ready for work. But it feels like someone took a metal baseball bat across the right side of my back. I’m finding it difficult to walk today. Luckily for me I have a doctors appointment already scheduled for a physical this morning, so during this visit I’m just gonna request diet pills because this excercising stuff is for someone who’s body won’t reject it; such as mine! Wish me luck that all my body parts are where they should be and my kidney isn’t in my uterus…which is where it feels like it is currently.